Whenever someone buys something, there’s something that resonates with them.
Somewhere in the mix of desired outcomes, emotions, trust and thought, there’s a ‘vibe’ that goes “Yeah. Want”.
And if ever you came out of a conversation with a potential buyer and they didn’t buy, it means that there was some element of resonance missing.
So how do you create that? How do you have the kind of sales conversation that resonates so much with people that they buy?
Lead with values.
The things that you’d get on a barricade for, and the things that you consider wrong.
You have them, and so does your buyer.
When talking to people, it’s easy to discover whether or not you have values and principles in common.
If you don’t, you’re out of alignment with that person – which isn’t a disaster, but it does make it more likely that you won’t reach enough resonance for them to buy.
The solution?
Put yourself in front of people who have similar or same values as you do.
That way, the moment you start talking, you’re aligned on an extremely important psychological level.
And as you converse, you’ll both discover that you have more and more values and principles in common.
Each time they realise that, they feel more aligned with you.
And that makes it SO much easier to create a client, compared to trying to enroll someone whose values are far off from yours.
Making sure your buyer-conversations are with people who are aligned with you is one of the quickest and most powerful ways to increase your conversion rate.
Did that click for you?
Then have a look at what the LEAP Framework for Ethical Selling can do for you…
Whether you’re a coach, a CEO, an artist or speaker or author or inventor or software develper:
People need you.
That’s why you get paid to show up and do your work.
In other words, there’s demand for what you bring.
And, it’s incumbent upon you (and every other professional) to supply and bring that thing you do to people.
And if you’re then also someone with a purpose – doing your work because it makes a difference – marketing, promoting and selling go from ‘necessary evil’ to something you can do with pride.
After all, they need you – and nobody is going to search in order to find the needle (i.e. you) in the haystack (the marketplace for your kind of work).
No, it’s up to you to show up and be findable.
That’s how people who need you get to have what you do, and benefit from it.
That way you fulfill the purpose you do it for, and that’s how you make the money too.
And that purpose can be anything you want – it doesn’t have to be ‘end world hunger’ or ‘invent the next generation of batteries for Tesla’.
Whether you create inclusive workplaces, or coach executives, or run PR campaigns for social enterprises, or teach maths, or coach entrepreneurs on servant-leadership: you’ve got a purpose and it’s valid (and I do hope you know what over-arching purpose is).
Work for that purpose, show up to the people who need you, and:
Discover your own best, most fun, true-to-values method for growing your influence, business, revenue, and impact.
Because if we don’t manage to sell, those who need us don’t get our work.
And if that happens, there’s a harsh question to ask:
Are we actually serving our purpose?
That question and it’s answer – the why and wherefore of your work – that’s why I teach and coach on business and sales.
Because folk like us, we do this thing we do for a purpose.
It’s our job to serve that purpose, and that requires getting good at enrolling people in our work.
That’s how we get to serve our purpose.
And if that resonates and you’re ready to scale up and enroll more buyers, have a look here – I think it might help.
If the idea of selling is difficult or uncomfortable for you in any way, remember this:
People love to buy, but loathe being sold to.
And that’s exactly why I’m so excited to show you the inner workings of the LEAP framework for ethical selling, tomorrow in my Flash Training: Sales for nice people.
Because once you get that – once you understand how to make it easy for people to buy, all your struggle in selling your work will change.
And besides: I’ll bet that you have something for sale that truly makes a difference in your buyer’s life.
And – forgive me for making assumptions – you want to see people buy that product or service you have.
But, you do want to stay in alignment with your values, right?
You don’t want to coerce, or be pushy, or manipulative – because hey, you want to sleep at night, knowing that your values, your integrity, and your ethics have not been compromised.
If I’m correct in assuming these statements ring true with you, we have a lot in common.
And as an ex-monk, ethics and integrity matter MUCH to me, just like I imagine they do to you.
Which is exactly why I never ‘sell to people’.
Instead, I just have a conversation. I ask questions, pay attention, tune in to what’s going on in the other person’s world.
And, most importantly, I let people make up their own mind, on whether or not to buy from me.
The result? Fantastic conversations that people are happy with whether or not they buy, and fantastically engaged and happy customers, when they do.
So what’s my secret?
Ain’t no secret.
Other than: I show up to serve.
Specifically, serving means that I help people get the clarity they need on making the best possible decision for themselves, at this point in time.
And if that decision is a ‘no thanks, not today’, I don’t fret.
Whenever that happens, I know I’ve stayed true to my moral compass, and I’ve helped someone choose what’s right for them.
You can do the same thing, once you realise that ‘selling’ – or enrolling – is nothing more than facilitating a decision-making process, which in itself is an act of service.
Want to know the full scoop, learn the ins and outs, of how an ex-monk creates clients, so that you can transform your own sales process, and sign on more people, with more ease, at the rates you deserve?
If ever you wonder why your marketing isn’t working better, ask yourself:
“Have you built enough generosity into it?”
If the answer is ‘yes’, ask:
“Am I being generous to the ‘wrong’ kind of person?”
Because if you give to takers, your gift goes nowhere and your generosity is wasted.
Adam Grant writes about givers, takers, and matchers, in his book Give & Take.
Research shows that givers – generous people – tend to be the most successful.
But, generous people also tend to be the *least* successful.
The difference between successful givers and unsuccessful givers, is that the successful ones don’t give to takers.
That’s not selfishness or being uncaring: it’s efficiency. It’s putting your resources where they’ll have most impact. For you, the recipient, and those that they give to.
Takers are like a black hole: whatever goes in, never comes out again.
Matchers and givers however, give back or pay forward, or both.
Be generous to those two, and hope that takers will learn someday.
But don’t give to them.
No matter how big your heart is, you’ll never have enough energy to make it worthwhile to give to takers.
They’ll just want more and you’ll burn up whatever resource and goodness you have; it won’t benefit them, or you, nor anyone else
Point is, generosity – in marketing and sales – is an enormously powerful driver.
It’s leverage.
It rests on the principle of creating value, before asking or wanting anything.
Do things that are valuable.
Make things that are valuable.
BE valuable – and not just as a human, because you already are.
Be valuable as a professional. In your marketing and sales.
Tune in to the people you want to serve, create something they’ll love and that will help them, and give it to them.
The above was a tweetstorm I wrote, off the cuff.
And the last tweet was:
“Huh. Looks like I wrote a tweetstorm.
“Well, best turn it into an article, and send it to my subscribers.
“I hope they’ll get something valuable out of it.”
See how it works?
This is just one example of how you can create value – and I hope this one was valuable for you.
Cheers,
Martin
P.s. If you’ve got your marketing dialled in but you feel you could improve your ability to enroll buyers, this will help.
Sane and ethical business owners don’t just want the money:
They also want their buyers to be happy for having purchased.
But wanting happy buyers isn’t enough.
You also have to want the money – and there’s nothing wrong with that.
If you don’t have financial goals for your business, and you only measure how happy people are, or how many of them you have, you’re working to reach a moving target.
How much happy? How many people happy? How scalable is their happy, if you’re not looking at the financial goals that enable you to re-invest, scale up, reach more people, make more people happy?
I meet a lot of wonderful people, committed to doing stellar work and serving clients.
But everyone I meet who only wants happy customers, and does not also want to reach specific money goals, struggles.
And you don’t have to struggle.
All you have to do is want the best of both worlds:
Want happy buyers.
Want the money.
Cheers,
Martin
P.s. Oh hey, and the best way to get happy buyers? Use a sales process that makes people want to enroll in your work, eagerly and voluntarily. You can learn that sales process with my 1 on 1 training on ethical selling.
The more someone else struggles or suffers, the more we feel it and the more we want to help them, make things right.
But more often than not, we get exactly the opposite result… and it’s only down to trying too hard.
For example, you’ll know that I’m very hot on meditation. It’s a wonderful thing, I’ve done it for 25 years, it’s done me tons of good, has scientific backup as to positive effects…
And yet, you’ll never see me make a case for meditation – not until someone asks me.
Because if I were to try and persuade someone to try it, it would mean ‘trying hard’ – and the problem is that today someone might be swayed by my recommendation, and try it, but because the choice was made because of my clever pitch and not because of their own inner pull, they’ll likely find it a disheartening experience and give up. Trust me, I’ve seen this more times than I can remember, since I started meditating 25 years ago.
And then they might consider themselves ‘not fit for meditation’ or vice versa, and never get back to it.
So by trying too hard, I would risk putting comeone off their own course. Much better to help those who want change, or meditation, or growth or whatever, and who want to start it now.
Self-motivated, self-inspired. It’s the best way for anyone to step into change, and the best way to help with that is by helping the other find their own solution, and not imposing our own good ideas on anything or anyone.
Now back to opening lines: the more we care about someone, and the more we hurt seeing their struggle, the more important it is to give the other space for wanting change or help, instead of proffering our help and suggestions before that person is ready.
It goes completely against our mind’s direction, because we know – our minds know – that we can help, that there’s a solution, that if only they’d listen…
But the mind will have to suck it up, because the more we try, the more wrong the mind is in its conviction.
Go ahead and try, helping someone who isn’t ready yet… has it ever worked?
Most likely, you ran into resistance and objections, and the other person’s process didn’t speed up, no matter how hard you tried.
Could even be that things stalled or slowed down, or maybe the conversation got difficult…
Or maybe you’ve been on the other side, where someone just wouldn’t stop trying to fix things for you and didn’t give you space to even think.
All because of ‘trying too hard’.
Their efforts didn’t exactly help you, right?
Pay attention to the gut-wrenching feelings of grief and compassion and pity and helpfulness, at seeing another person’s struggle, and when you notice them: check yourself.
You might just be on the verge of giving the person the very opposite of what you want for them.
Be available, ready, present, but be careful not to hamper the other’s process by inadvertently getting in the way.
If you really want to help, create a space and a conversation that enables the other person to seek and find their own inner pull, and avoid trying too hard to help.
Which, incidentally, applies to all kinds of relationships and conversations: spouses, children, vendors, team members, clients and prospects.
No matter who it is: the harder we try to help, the easier it is to help less. But now you know what to look out for…
Cheers,
Martin
P.s. This whole attitude of helping people to want help by not trying to help so forcefully, is the foundation of my LEAP framework for ethical selling, and it’s really effective… and it actually helps. Both you and your buyers. More information here.
Had a chat with an old friend – one of the guys who used to visit the monastery. He’s in business too these days, so it was fun to chat and compare notes.
And once again, I had someone tell me “I don’t like selling”.
“I don’t like that the moment you have something for sale, it’s a nasty situation, because it means you want something from people”.
Is that true though?
Me I’ve got plenty for sale, but I don’t want anything from anyone.
I want things for other people – not from other people.
I want for readers to enjoy a daily dose of healthy business thinking.
I want for clients to get the very best of me, and for them to transform their life and their business.
And for potential clients, I want for them to make the best possible decision, whether that means working with me, or not. Both outcomes are fine, as long as the outcome is best for the person I’m talkin to.
So my friend suffers from two problems: first is the good-egg problem, where the better kind of person someone is, the more they prevent themselves from getting out there and helping people. It’s a very common thing.
Th second problem is in his way of thinking, because:
It’s never about getting anything from people. Not for people who operate from the heart.
And, when you also sell from the heart, when you enroll because you’d truly love to work with that person and they themselves buy in voluntarily, you’re not taking anything: you’re giving.
And as long as the sales conversation goes on, you get to give them super powerful and enjoyable conversations, the kind that will help and be remembered.
And if the stars align, the other person will stop you and say ‘How do I get more of this?’ or ‘When do we start?’ or ‘Take my money!’ – all of which are things I’ve been told.
It isn’t ‘I want something from you’, it’s: ‘If you’re this kind of person, I have something for you’.
And when it’s ‘no sale’?
Then it wasn’t for them, at this point. But if you do it right, you’ll have had such a pleasant exchange, that the non-buyer remembers it positively, which means they’ll be happy to hear from you when you follow up.
And you never know when someone will ready themselves to buy. (hint: it’s never when we’re trying to push. that isn’t ‘being ready’, that’s ‘being coerced’).
So remember: selling the way nice people do it, is about having something for someone, wanting something for them.
And I have something for you, if you want it:
A 10-week, personal, 1 on 1 training on ethical selling.
Whenever you find yourself in a situation where someone isn’t going along with the good ideas you have, you need to ask yourself:
Are the two of you trading in compatible currencies?
Because if you’re not, and you’re not aware of it, you’ll go nowhere real fast with that person.
For example:
A husband comes home to find his wife distressed and upset. Oops… something’s happened.
He sits down, listens to her troubles, and starts thinking of ways to help, to improve the situation, to fix things for her.
Useful, no? Girl’s got a problem, let’s help, let’s see if we can fix it!
Except his wife grows increasingly upset. Frustrated, even.
Until finally the whole conversation disintegrates: he ends up frustrated because she doesn’t seem to want his help, and she’s upset because ‘he just never listens’ to her.
In such a situation, the ‘currency’ she’s hoping for, is someone who listens, who gives her space to vent, so she can clear her head, get some clarity, and not feel alone in her troubles.
At that stage, she’s not looking for a solution, but someone to just be present.
He on the other hand, is trying to ‘pay’ a different kind of currency, in the form of quality problem-solving.
But that’s not what she wants – and so we end up with incompatible currencies.
The problem arises when we interpret the other person’s situation, conclude that we know what they want, and proceed to try and give it to them.
A client might say: “I want a website with custom branding and e-commerce built in”, and on the surface that seems straightforward enough.
But below the surface, they might want different things, like:
‘A site that works, doesn’t break, and that’s easy to manage and update’.
Or: ‘A site that enables me to earn more from the traffic I’m getting’.
Or: ‘An online presence that I’m proud of’.
You can’t know what’s behind the obvious, and even when you ask, you’ll only learn what they tell you, which may or may not be the complete picture.
So if you then go answer – and try to fulfill – the surface-level wishes, you likely speak to something that isn’t the real, true, deeper desire… and you might lose the client.
Whenever you try to help someone, serve someone, or try and do something in order to solve a problem for someone… but they’re not having none of it?
Ask yourself: Are you trying to ‘pay’ in a ‘currency’ they don’t want?
Cheers,
Martin
P.s. Before November is out, I’ll be raising the price of my 1 on 1 training for the LEAP Ethical Selling Framework. For now it’s still available at $1500, should you want to upgrade your communication and selling skills.
A potential client will only make a decision to buy, when they are good and ready – and that means, they need to *see* themselves enjoying the benefit of having bought your thing.
That’s the vision element of a sales process: getting to the point where they see the vision you have for them.
But before they’ll buy in to that vision, they need to trust you.
Unless there’s trust, they’re not going to have that vision.
And, in order to gain trust, you need to gain permission first.
Permission to explain, permission to ask questions, and, yes: Permission to ultimately ask for the sale.
And so selling in an ethical way, where you have sales conversations that people enjoy, works like this:
First, you gain permission – to explore their situation, to address objections, to discover what they need.
Do that right, and you’ll earn their trust. Trust that you’re looking out for them, that you’re not just in it for the money, and – very importantly – that your product or service is what they need, and that it’ll solve their problem.
That trust causes people to get curious, to ask you questions, and that builds a vision in their minds.
And once that vision is ready, and they’ve sold themselves on wanting your thing – that’s when you get to ask for the sale, and that’s when they make the decision to buy (or not).
And if they don’t, you graciously accept their no, and you continue the conversation (i.e. you follow up in a pleasant way) until such time that they are ready.
There you go: ethical selling in a nutshell.
Hey, and what if the nutshell isn’t enough for you, but you actually want to get your head around ethical selling, and get really good at it?
