Martin Stellar - Coach & Consultant for ethical sales and business growth

Martin Stellar - Coach & Consultant for ethical sales and business growth

Stop Drawing Monsters

There’s very little in this world that can’t be fixed by taking  action.

Except, it’s so easy to let fear stop us.

But fear is just an illusion, it’s an emotion we make up based on a mix of previous experience and extrapolated possibilities.

To paraphrase Steve Chandler:

“A man in a mental asylum takes paper and crayons and sits down at a table.

On the paper he draws a monster.

He looks at it, screams in horror, and bolts out of the room.

Funny, isn’t it?

No it’s not.

Because that’s exactly what fear is:

Something we create, which then scares us.

A creative mind gone wrong.

The good news is that you can stop doing that.

You can stop drawing monsters, and get yourself into action.

You can stop creating states of fear.

When you do that, your emotional reaction will be based on the very real result you created, instead of the mental monster you concocted up for yourself.

Which action?

Depends on where you’re at, which problems you want to solve. and which ambitions you want to realise.

Start with the question: ‘What result do I want?’, followed by ‘what’s the best way to get there?’.

Next, break that ‘best way into ever smaller steps, until you get to something so small, you can do it right now, and finish it within 30 or 60 minutes. Or even less.

Smaller is better.

Do the thing, and then do the next.

Build momentum, and keep going.

And if the problem in need of solving is ‘lack of income’, I can help.

More information here:



When You Think You Need a J-O-B… Maybe Do This Instead…

Yesterday I spoke to an artist who told me she was looking for a job.

Bills to pay, sales not happening – so getting a job is the sensible, responsible thing to do.

Or is it?

After all, if you’re en entrepreneur, working for a boss is probably not what you’re waiting for.

Then there’s the fact that looking for job can be a long and tiring affair – where you spend a lot of time without knowing if it’s going to pay off.

Plus the fact that unless you’re in your twenties, your age might mean you’re not the ideal candidate.

And to make it even worse, if you’ve been self-employed for a good number of years, you’ll look unemployable to many employers.

So I asked this artist: “If you could have any job in the world, anything at all, what would it be?”

“Novelist!” she chirped.

So I asked her if she’d enjoy something similar, but easier to get. Because I don’t know too many jobs where you get paid to be a novelist.

“Could you see yourself editing articles for people, as a side hustle?”

She said yes, and so I went to town: giving her an entire setup on how she can start looking for clients, as of today.

How to deal with pricing, how to pitch, what read flags to look for when vetting prospective clients – the works.

A complete mini-education on how to start and grow a freelance business as a copy-editor.

She was thrilled, completely fired up and ready to get started.

And I thought:

But what about my other readers?

I know for a fact that not everyone earns enough money.

Some of you have told me you struggle to make ends meet.

So what if I could help those people – you, perhaps? – in a similar way?

Well, I can.

Starting today, I can give you Side-Hustle Consulting.

Here’s how it works:

We spend an hour on Skype, and we start by looking at what job would be absolutely ideal for you.

Where ‘ideal for you’ is the most important thing.

Because if you are, say, a fine art photographer, I’m not going to suggest you start shooting weddings if the idea of that would make your skin crawl.

For a side hustle to work, you’ve got to enjoy it. So that’s where we start.

Then we tailor that ideal job down to a small offer – either a product or a service – that you can sell to people who already need it.

Next, I will give you ways to get your offer in front of clients who are already looking for that solution you offer.

Well talk about pricing, presentation, visibility, handling clients – whatever you need to know in order to quickly turn your side hustle into a nice bit of additional income.

To make sure you can focus on the conversation instead of taking notes, I’ll record the session and will send you the recording.

After that, you play the recording, take notes, and next?

You get to work on building up your side hustle, so that you can earn money on your own terms, without having to look for a job.

Because I’m sure you could serve a mean mocha frappucino or whatever drink is fashionable these days, but if you’re an entrepreneur, you ought to work for yourself and not for then man. Is how I see it.

But remember: this is only for people who are willing to do the work, and stick with it.

If you’re going to give it a few days and give up if you get no results, this won’t help you. As with anything, you’ve got to make it work.

Practical matters:

This 1-hour consultation is $149, payable in advance, no refunds.

Do I guarantee you’ll make money? No, I can not guarantee your results or your revenue, but I will guarantee you this:

You will have a complete setup to start implementing, and one that you’ll enjoy working on.

Because without fun, what’s the point in working?

So if you want to add to your income, and you’re willing to put in the work to make it happen, reply to this email.

I’ll send you payment information and a link where you can book a time in my calendar.



P.s. You’ll also get my brand new ebook ‘The Spyhole Salesman’s Business Secret’ for free – a short but valuable insight in how to develop a side hustle. It includes a simple but effective 4-week strategy you can use on social media, to get people to buy your spyhole offer.

At $95, this might be the best investment you could choose.

But I can only fit a few of these sessions into my calendar, so spots are limited. Don’t miss out, and let me know you want this.

Watch Your Mind: GiGo

We all know that if you put diesel into a petrol engine, the car won’t run.

If you cook with food gone bad, the meal will stink.

If you teach a kid bad morals, he’ll grow up to be a crook.

In other words: if you put garbage into it, what comes out is garbage.

Or in the world of programming: GiGo.

Garbage in, garbage out.

If you write a computer program and you do it badly, it won’t run.

So logical, so very clear to see.

So then, why do we keep putting garbage into our minds?

Why do we keep telling ourselves things that can only produce bad results?

If I keep telling myself ‘I suck, look at what a miserable failure I am’, I program my mind to seek confirmation of that.

Which will make me see and find it all day long.

What’s worse, it’ll program me to create situations that confirm it.

And everything goes to hell in a handbasket.

Whereas, if I keep telling myself ‘I can fix this, I’m creative and I like solving problems’, I suddenly open up a world of creative problem-solving.

What you put into your mind, is what comes out.

And the most perniciously destructive things to tell yourself?


Whether you judge others, you are 100% guaranteed to stay stuck.


Because when you judge others, you fail to do the most important thing in life:

Looking at yourself.

They do this! They are that! He is a such and so! She’s a whatever!

Mhm, you might be right.

But when you’re looking at others, you’re not looking at yourself.

And that, looking at yourself, and developing self-awareness, is the single most powerful and beneficial thing you can do for yourself.

So pay attention to the way you think about others.

Don’t feed your mind with garbage, and remember that each time you judge someone else, you’re not getting to know thyself.

If this rings true with you, and you’re ready and committed to make a change in this habit of judging…

… If you REALLY want to get to know yourself…

Then maybe we should talk.

Just reply to this email…



Solved: You Can Stop Selling Now

I can’t blame you if you find selling difficult or if it’s something you’d rather avoid.

Though we both know that if you run a business, selling your work is a must.

So there’s this thing you need, and a mindset (or viewpoint) that stands in your way.

Alright, let me help.

After all, marketing and selilng have gotten a real bum rap over the years, what with manipulation and unethical practices.

So stop thinking about selling or sales.

Instead, think of it like this:

When someone decides to buy your work…

Don’t call it a sale – call it enrolling.

It doesn’t just have to apply to enrolling in a course.

Whether you sell books or art or coaching or smoothies:

The person who gives you money enrolls in your view, your principles, your mission and your business idea.

They enroll in a life where your work has become part of that life.

So from now on, you’ll never have to ‘sell’ anything again.

All you need to do is find people who will want to buy into you, whatever it is you do.

Selling vs enrolling.

Makes all the difference, doesn’t it?



Are You Living Up to It?

I couldn’t tell if he was the Cheshire Cat, or Buddha, or my dad or my abbot.

But this was my dream, so it didn’t matter.

Besides, the smile was there.

And he just looked like someone with lessons to teach.

From the depth of my mind, a question came up.

“What does it mean when they say: ‘Hell on earth?’”

He waved his arm and a scene appeared.

A huge banquet hall, with rows and rows of tables.

Succulent dishes as far as the eye could see.

At the tables sat people, but not as you and I know them.

Because these people didn’t have hands – instead, they had chopsticks where hands would be.

And no matter how hard they tried, they were all but unable to feed themselves.

What a strange sight.

So I asked:

“And heaven on earth?”

Another scene appeared, almost perfectly identical.

Except for this:

Instead of trying to feed themselves and failing, the people fed each other across the table.

And the smile asked me:

“Which world do you want to live in?”

“The latter of course!” was my reply.

And as I slowly woke up, his final question rang through my mind:

“Are you living up to it?”

Cheers everybody.

Happy Monday.


Serving vs Pleasing: Stop Changing Diapers

Look, we all want to help others.

It’s just part of being human.

But some ways of helping help, while others don’t.

Some ways of ‘helping’ actually make the other person worse off.

If you’re a teacher or a parent, you KNOW that pampering people does them no good.

And while I’m not a parent, I did get taught this lesson, over and over again.

Each time I would go to my abbot for some help that wouldn’t help me, his reply would be:

“I’m not your nanny”.

And with that, he kept throwing me back onto my own resourcefulness.

Harsh, but fair.

And oh so effective.

Sometimes, the best help you can give someone is a bit of tough love.

And the one kind of help that never helps:


Instead of pleasing people, why not serve them?

Like my abbot did: he never tried to please me, but always served me.

And that’s something we can all do.

Serving vs pleasing…

One strengthens and helps, the other enables the other person’s helplessness.

And nobody deserves the latter.

I suppose people-pleasing is hardest to stop for parents.

After all, it is or has been your job, for years, to provide safety, and food, and an environment that enables growth.

But at some point the child no longer needs that, because they need to stand on their own two feet, a bit more every day.

And I often see parents who carry the people-pleasing, taking-care-of-everyone-but-themselves to an extreme.

So if that’s you: stop changing diapers.

People are old and wise enough to take care of themselves, and if you people-please them, you rob them of that power.

Help people by serving them, not by pleasing.

You’ll do them (and yourself) the biggest favour possible.

And if you want to do yourself an enormous favour, maybe get yourself a coach.

If that would be me, be forewarned: I’ll serve you, but I’ll never try to please you.

You know, just so you know what to expect.



Wherever You Go, There You Are

That’s not trite pop-culture, it’s a fact.

Except most of us, we’re not aware of it. We aren’t aware of ourselves.

So we blame, condemn, judge, reject – anything to avoid looking at ourselves.

When in reality, what we see is what we are.

That’s how perception works.

Now, if you’re of a more scientific bent, you might disagree.

You might consider outside reality to be an objective  presence, something that exists independently of you.

And while that’s probably true, it’s equally true that whatever reality you perceive, you are the one doing the perceiving.

And that means that you colour what you perceive.

There’s no other way.

You assign meaning to what you perceive.

One man might find it chilly today, while the other says it’s nice and mild out.

Same reality, two perceptions.

Sorry for the existentialist-philosophical side track btw. Regular programming will now resume.

So you as the perceiver are the determining factor in how you perceive.

Which means that the world you see is a reflection of you.

How you perceive something tell you something about how you’re configured.

Which is another way of saying: wherever you go, there you are.

And that notion is SO helpful, because you can learn a ton about yourself from how you perceive stuff.

And, you can change yourself, which causes you to perceive a different reality.

Somebody wrongs you? They probably have a reason for thinking that it’s right, even if they’re mistaken. So you get to ask yourself why it would be right, in their opinion.

Things don’t work out the way you want them to? The you get to consider it a learning experience that enables you to give it another go, only in a better way.

Stuff taking too long, success too slow on the pickup? Then you learn that you’re being impatient, and you get to change your expectations.

What it comes down to is reframing:

However you perceive something, there’s always another way that you can CHOOSE to perceive it.

But only always.

With the key word here being ‘choose’.

Because at any given time, remember that you’re the one who is the reason for how you perceive something.

And if you don’t like what you perceive, the only possible way to create change, is to change your perception.

So never forget:

Wherever you go, there you are.

Getting people to see that, and to discover how utterly malleable reality becomes once you get a grip on changing your perception, is what makes coaching so much fun.

So if you’re ready to change yourself and your perception and your reality, let me know.

I promise you a fun ride of discovery and change.



Being vs Having

There’s a big difference between what you have and what you are.

Except most people mix the two up.

And I’m talking about the thoughts and the feelings that you – wait for it – have.

Because you’re not your thoughts .

You’re not your feelings.

You just HAVE them.

But we identify with them.

We call ourselves insecure because we feel insecure.

But that makes no sense.

Feeling insecure doesn’t mean that you have to BE it.

Or we call ourselves a failure because when we think of our life and career, there’s been a ton of unsuccessful attempts.

But thinking about things you tried that didn’t succeed doesn’t make you BE a failure.

If anything, it makes you be a person who tried a lot and learned a lot.

Because no experiment ever fails.

This confusion, the human tendency to mix up what you think&feel with that what you are, is destructive.

It closes you into a self-defined self-image, of a kind that programs you to not evolve and grow and experiment.

Think about it.

Suppose you think to yourself: “I’ll never succeed. I can’t make this work, I’ll never amount to anything”.

(a very common and very human thought pattern).

What kind of future would you have, if you were to take that as the definition of you?

Not a very fun future.

So take a step back, and observe yourself.

See that you ARE a person, who HAS thoughts and feelings.

Recognise that the having and the being are not the same.

And realise that what you think and feel is very, very relative.

Take it from an ex-monk.

Because for years, I kept thinking that what I think matters. That how I feel is significant.

And I’m not saying your thoughts and feelings aren’t relevant – the point is that they are relative.

They can change and they do, all the time.

You learn something new, and your thinking changes.

Someone smiles at you and your sour mood lifts, or someone lashes out and your mood crashes.

Totally unstable, all of it.

And you want to define yourself by something as fickle as the wind?

Nah. You’re better than that.

When I coach people, this theme often comes up.

Because it’s SO human to mistake the having for the being.

And every time that a client sees the difference and stops this dysfunctional identifying, big changes happen in their lives.

Want some of that for yourself?

Maybe I can help.

Here’s info about what it looks like to work together:



Damn the Torpedoes. Full Steam Ahead!

So far, I’ve only told three or four people what my upcoming book will be about.

No public mention, no drumming up attention…

Because: “What if someone ‘steals’ the (very cool) title?’

What if someone with a bigger audience and a bigger marketing budget picks it up and creates a course or brand around it, before my book gets published?

So I asked my publisher, Maurice Bassett, his thoughts.

In a nutshell, his answer was: Damn the torpedoes. Full steam ahead.

And yeah, he’s right.

For one thing, I should eat my own dogfood: when a client tells me they need to copyright something, my answer is always: “Do you? I think you need everyone in the world to know that you created this. Your audience will protect you from copycats”.

Also: these days you need a lot of publicity before a book comes out.

Because it’s a crowded marketplace, and now that the internet has emancipated us, and given us the chance to self-publish, there’s a slew of books published every day.

And some of them sell really well, even though the content and quality aren’t all that great.

Hey ho, three cheers for marketing.

So if my book is to do well, and change lives the way I intend it to, I need to start spreading the word.

And I start today.

If all goes well, this summer Maurice will publish:

“The Prosperous Artist – The creative professional’s guide to allowing money into your life”.

And boy does it make me nervous to tell you about it.

Sh*t’s about to get real.

But yes. Damn the torpedoes, and full steam ahead.

So today’s lesson is this:

The thing that scares you and makes you nervous – it’s very likely exactly the thing you need to do.

What’s your scary thing, the one you want but your fear is stopping you?



And My Word for the Year Is….

… actually not a word, but a phrase.

The other day I had a skype call with my wonderful friend, the artist and coach Jessica Serran.

And she asked me what my word for the year was.

After a moment’s pause, I said: “Let’s take it to the stage”.

Because really, I’m done playing small.

I never thought I had grand things to share, but over the years – working with artists and authors and all kinds of entrepreneurs – it’s been made clear to me that whatever message I do have to share,
needs to get out into the world.

And working like this, with a small list and a handful of wonderful clients – well, that just isn’t big enough.

Besides: Aren’t I the one who always tells you to dream big, that the bigger and more audacious your goal, the better?


So I’m stepping up to the plate.

First, I’m writing a book.

Not another ebook either: here we’re talking about a physical book.

And not self-published, but published by an official publisher.

I am SO excited. He accepted my book proposal in the 1st of January, I have the outline basically done, and this week I’m going over it with his editor.

With a bit of luck it’ll be out in the wild sometime this summer.

And next? Well, let’s take it to the stage, right?

I’m planning to start speaking in public, to get in front of even more people.

Where this will take me?

No idea, but I’m dreaming big.

Reaching a TED stage will be just a milestone.

A big one, but you bet I’m not going to stop there.

So that’s my word (phrase) for the year.

Let’s take it to the stage.

What’s your word for the year?

What’s the sign that governs this year for you?

(And no, I’m not talking about the Zodiac. I mean the word that signifies what you want this year to be like for you).

I’m curious, let me know.



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