Oh Man I Miss the @Rimshotbot – And I'll Miss You If You Disappear

Few years ago there was a twitter account I just loved.

It was a bot, but such a fun bot.

It scanned the twitterverse, for anyone using the word ‘rimshot’.

You know, the badum-tshh sound they make on the drums after a comedian tells a joke.

As soon as you’d say #rimshot, you’d get a reply from the @rimshotbot.

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Client About to Drive off a Cliff – Again

I thought this might be useful for you. It’s an email I sent to a client last night.

I’ve mentioned him before: he’s getting ready to launch his business, and still has a few big problems on his site.

Notably, his landing pages are broken: the copy is good (obviously – I wrote it – don’t ever let anyone accuse me of modesty).

But the design and layout is a mess. The pages won’t convert. So I offered him a report+wireframes, and since he’s a client who keeps sending me jobs, I offered this at a stupid discount.

 He declined, saying his web development team will fix the problems.

 I’m fine with that, but…

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Why a Little Bit of You Makes You Come Alive To Them

I was talking to a friend the other day about her marketing.

She owns a little grocery store here in town, and she asked my help in order to attract clients from a wealthy neighbourhood.

Her plan was to distribute a little flyer to raise awareness and interest.

I put together some copy giving the reader some fine incentives to come visit her shop, and printed it out to show her.

But I don’t want my picture on it, Martin. I’m not that coquette, you know? It’s not about me”.

I smiled at her, because I like it when people say smart things.

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Smart Guy: I Don't Want to go to His Shop, But I Probably Will

A few times a year, everything in this town gets covered by a thin film of fine red sand.

It gets carried across the Mediterranean sea when the wind is just right, and it actually is sand from the Sahara.

I got on my motorbike, started, and drove away to a horrible crunching sound.

It was the Sahara sand on the chain, and it causes massive wear on the chain, so on my way out of town I stopped at a workshop to have the guy clean off the sand.
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Black Bus Driver Reinvents Marketing and Prevents a Suicide While He's At It

Heartwarming.

Big lesson, too.

Here’s how a regular guy used the single most powerful persuasion technique to save a life.

And, like I always teach: he used persuasion to achieve a greater good.

Darnell Barton was driving his bus on a Buffalo highway.

A woman stood perched on the edge of the bridge.

Our world and her world were about to disconnect – 7 seconds and 400 feet from now.

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Here's How You Know Marketers Are Lying to You

Sometimes I get real annoyed.

Especially when I see people trying to befuddle honest people like you and me.

Here we are, trying to carve out a niche and make a nice living for ourselves.

We have a business, a plan, a strategy, and we’re working hard.

Along comes some supposed marketing guru, telling you:

“Stop, you’re doing it wrong.Forget everything you know, because everything has changed, and business has never been easier.

All you need is this here new product.

Buy this, and you won’t have to worry.

Sales will be automatic and the internet will be your cash machine.”

And then they start telling you all the things you can ignore.

Design? Doesn’t matter, just drive more traffic!

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Never Serve Noir a Cold Beer

The waiter walked by unawares, when Noir’s hand suddenly snapped out at him, locking his bicep in Noir’s vice-like fist.

“Why” Noir said grimly, “is this beer not cold?”

The boy began “It’s probably because…”

Noir cut him short: “That’s a rhetorical question. Google it.

And bring me a cold one.

Thanks, kid.”

 

There are two kinds of customers: The first is like Martin Noir, the other one is like me.

And though Noir isn’t necessarily a fun kind of client to displease, you’d rather have him than me.

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Marketing and Communication 101: One page, One message.

Marketing is communication before anything else.

Communication happens in different ways, for different reasons.

The end result is a sale, and before that there’s getting known, liked and trusted.

Building up those emotions in your reader or prospect is a gradual process.

The single best way to hamper the growth of all those good and positive feelings?

 

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How to Dramatically Increase Your Email Response Rate – Right NOW

 

How?

Just ask.

That simple.

Seriously.

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Hype copy: Even More Devastating Than You Might Think

Yesterday I told you about hype copy, and what a filthy beast it is.

But hype copy (or aggressive marketing strategies in general) have a dark side beyond a lack of ethics.

See, if you sell based on hype and scare-tactics, you attract the wrong kind of customers.

When you use hype you prey on the weak.

That’s dirty, but it also means that you’ll get buyers who buy only because they are scared.

After all, hype is a mix of overblown claims (eww) and frantically pushing pinpoints (scaring people).

If you generate a sale with that, you may have closed, but you’ll also have a problem.

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