Martin Stellar - Coach & Consultant for ethical sales and business growth

Martin Stellar - Coach & Consultant for ethical sales and business growth

I help nice people sell more

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Am I Being Vulnerable Enough?

“Your problem, Martin, is that you’re afraid to be vulnerable”.

I reflected for a moment.

And I realised:

It’s not that I don’t want to show my vulnerable side – the problem was that I didn’t trust her enough to be vulnerable around her.

And at that moment, I also realised the relationship was coming to an end.

Now let’s change tack, and translate vulnerability to business.

They say that being vulnerable is a key strength, and I agree.

And over the last few weeks, I’ve been wondering:

Am I being vulnerable enough – with you, my readers and clients?

It’s not that I’m prone to holding back, but am I showing you the real me, including those aspects I’d rather keep to myself?

The author and speaker Brené Brown says that ‘what makes you vulnerable makes you beautiful’.

Which I find a lovely way of looking at things.

She also talks about a ‘vulnerability hangover’ – when you’ve opened up about something, and the next day you heart jumps: “Oh my god, did I really share that?”

And the truth is, I rarely feel that way.

There’s been a few moments – like when I wrote an article entitled ‘Make it hard, she said – and then we ended up having tea’.

That gave me a vulnerability hangover, to be sure.

And last Friday, when I sent an email to a friend.

In it, I told her my answer to the question posed the night before:

“Martin, what’s your ultimate ambition?”

The answer I gave, and which I told her in the email, still confuses and scares me.

Even now, writing this, I feel nervous and jittery.

My friend didn’t reply instantly, like she normally does.

And so I had a massive vulnerability hangover for a few days: Had I shown too much of myself?

And here I am, wondering if I should tell you what my ‘ultimate ambition’.

I don’t want to, it scares me, and I’m worried about all kinds of opinions you might have of me.

But since I preach that it’s healthy to move towards fear, I’ve no choice to eat my own dogfood, and share with you.

My ultimate ambition?

That my headstone will read: “Without Martin, humanity might not have survived”.

So there, I said it.

And I’m SO aware of the conceit present in that statement.

Who, ME? Having such an impact on the world?

C’mon Martin, you’re just a guy.

Who are you kidding?

The world needs you that bad?

I don’t know, and I don’t care.

All I know is that I want to have the biggest impact on the world I possibly can.

And my every day is dedicated to working on that.

Meanwhile, I sure hope the world will never depend on me for its survival, because I don’t know if I have it in me.

But still. My mission is there.

So there you have it, my ultimate ambition.

I hope it’s vulnerable enough for you.

Hey, so but: what about you?

What’s the vulnerable side of you, that you’d want to show but are afraid to?

And: what would your life be like, if you’d show it?

Cheers,

Martin

I help nice people sell more

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Results

Martin helped our co-working space get to full occupancy and $25.000 monthly revenue in less than a year.

~ Antonio Herrezuelo,
Avenida Capital

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