Call In the Missionairies!

Most everyone I work with has a big mission, something important they want to put into the world.

In fact, I deliberately seek out people who want to manifest something meaningful, something beyond ‘making a living’.

It’s what fires me up, when someone has some form of ‘a better world’ as part of their goal.

But at the same time, this ‘do-good’ attitude can also be an Achilles’ heel.

Especially when we give too much of ourselves.

Yes, I said that.

It is possible to give too much of ourselves.

Which might be odd, coming from an ex-monk who spent his life practising self-effacement and putting the other first.

But let’s face it: if you don’t put your own oxygen mask on first, how are you going to help anyone else?

You need to take care of yourself, or else none of your good intentions will have any effect.

And sadly, many people with a big passion for helping others seem unable to take care of themselves properly.

You know: the Mother Theresa complex – where something tells you that you need to give give give, no matter the cost or the return.

And out you go, serving and giving and helping – and you come home empty and depleted.

So should we become selfish?

Not in the least.

The thing to do when your desire to change the world isn’t working?

Two things.

First: give to matchers and givers, and be very careful not to give to takers.

Because takers keep it for themselves, instead of sharing forward or giving back.


Give to people who want your help.

Listen for the call, the request, the sign that – spoken or unspoken – says: Can you help me?

Because when you give and help to people who aren’t looking for help, aren’t receptive, what will happen?

You burn out, is what.

And believe me, I’ve spent many years making that mistake.

All the time forcing help onto others, when those people just had no need or interest or receptivity.

And it resulted in nothing but fatigue.

Thing is, we’re not a one-man religion.

It’s not our purpose to convert the entire world to accepting our help, like some sort of missionary-movement.

So sometimes, you need to call in the missionaries.

That’s my term for ‘stop giving without aim, take care of self, and give deliberately and purposefully’.

When you do that, when you ‘call in the missionaries’, you can truly give, and truly help, those who are looking for help.

Are you looking for help?

Then I’m here for you.

Just ask.



Last Chance to Hit Me With a Sledgehammer

“You know”, I told the man who was my abbot for 12 years, “it’s just so frustrating”. He looked at me with a raised eyebrow – is Martin going to whinge again? “The people who work with me – they get such benefits, such change and they’re so happy they got me on their team. […]

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Meditation, Coaching, and the Taste of Strawberries (Offer Ends Tomorrow)

Two questions, about two very different things – but with exactly the same answer. The first, when I had just asked my abbot what meditation is like, before I got started. His answer: “Tell me what a strawberry tastes like”. I sat and thought, and then I tried to tell him: “Well it’s sweet, and […]

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Celibacy Not Required

It’s late 1990’s and a young future monk named Martin is sat crosslegged on the floor. In front of him a Macintosh LC II on top of a low table, a cup of coffee next to the keyboard. I’m working on a translation of one of the abbot’s texts, and I lean back to contemplate […]

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Offer Ends on Wednesday: First Come, First Coached (at no Cost)

I’m curious about you. About what you’re like, and what you do, and the goals you have in life. I wonder what you want your legacy to be. I’d like to know what drives you, what your specific view on life is. In other words: I’d like to meet YOU. And above all: I’m dying […]

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Should an Artist Ever Pay a Gallery to Show Their Work?

If you know me, you might think I’d answer with a hearty ‘NO!’ But things are not that simple. Let’s look at a few cases: My friend Gym Halama, for example. Paid hundreds of Euros to participate in a group expo in a European capital.a lady in Italy, in order to participate in a group […]

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How a Rubber Duck Can Debug Your Creative Career

The programmer stared at the screen: still not right. He’d been working on this application for days, and he thought he’d found and fixed all bugs, but nope. There was still something wrong in the code, and for the life of him he couldn’t find out what. Annoying, frustrating, aggravating! He calmed himself down, and […]

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Brilliant New Book By My Coach – Get a Copy for Free!

If productivity, motivation, and that tricky money issue has ever been something you want to get better at: My coach, Mark McGuinness of has just released a new book that will help you. A LOT. I read a preview copy a few weeks ago, and it’s GOOD. Highly recommended. Get a free copy here: […]

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What to Do When It Just Ain’t Happening

Sometimes, lack of results can be confounding. Especially when you’re taking action, and stepping out of your comfort zones, and doing all the right things. By all expectations, people ought to be getting in touch, making inquiries, buying your work… And yet, something must be wrong, because it just isn’t happening. When clients present me […]

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Beware the Marshmallow – It Will Make or Break Your Success (Seriously!)

More specifically: your attitude to marshmallows – or any other fun and gratifying thing. Yes, I’m being serious. This matters, so I urge you to read this one today. In the 60’s and 70’s, two Stanford researchers performed a series of studies designed to test the willpower and ability to delay gratification on a group […]

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